The Dream Audit—If It Doesn’t Scare You, It’s Too Small
Are You Dreaming Big—Or Just Dreaming Safe?
When was the last time you had a dream so big it made you nervous to say it out loud?
A dream so wild, so out of reach, that you hesitated before writing it down?
A dream that made you pause because you didn’t know if you had the resources, connections, or roadmap to make it happen?
Because here’s the truth:
If your dream doesn’t scare you a little bit—it’s probably too small.
But many of us aren’t dreaming at that level. Not because we don’t want to, but because we’ve been trained to shrink our vision.
A Black woman stands at a crossroads in the center, hand on heart, looking toward the right with longing and determination. On the left is a dimmer, smaller, confined space representing safe, comfortable dreams—muted colors, familiar territory, walls closing in. On the right is a breathtakingly expansive, beautiful, polished landscape of possibility with bright burnt orange and gold light radiating outward—open sky, soaring possibilities, elegant and stunning. The right side is clearly more beautiful, more expansive, more desirable. Her expression shows she's drawn to the bigger, more beautiful path.
The Limits We Don’t Even Realize We’ve Accepted
For too long, we’ve been taught to dream with caution.
✔ “Be realistic.” – As if reality isn’t something that can be expanded.
✔ “Don’t get your hopes up.” – As if disappointment is more dangerous than settling.
✔ “Know your place.” – As if somebody else gets to decide that for you.
And because of that, we adjust. We aim for what feels safe. We set goals that are within reach. We limit ourselves to what we’ve seen work before—instead of what’s actually possible.
But let me ask you something:
When has anything truly great been achieved by playing it safe?
History isn’t built by people who stayed inside the lines. Legacy isn’t created by people who only did what was expected.
Everything you admire—every breakthrough, every success story, every moment of greatness—started with someone bold enough to think beyond what was in front of them.
Why should your life be any different?
SIDE BAR: 💭 Does the dream scare you… or does the size of you scare you?.
You don’t have to admit this out loud, but hear me:
Sometimes the dream isn’t what feels overwhelming. It’s the version of you who would have to rise to meet it.
The bolder you.
The louder you.
The you who doesn’t apologize.
The you who stops waiting for a green light that’s already inside her.
If your dream feels too big, maybe it’s just the first time you’ve seen yourself without the limits other people put on you.
Breathe.
You’re not being “unrealistic.”
You’re remembering who you were before the world taught you to play small.
Let the dream stretch you.
It’s trying to show you your real size.
A Black woman looks down or inward with a contemplative expression. Around her are visual representations of obstacles and fears—shadows, chains, walls, limiting thoughts swirling around her. She looks trapped by these barriers.
What’s Holding You Back from Dreaming Bigger?
Let’s get real: You don’t have to be convinced that bigger is possible. You have to be convinced that it’s possible for YOU.
And that’s where a lot of us get stuck.
✔ You can believe in someone else’s million-dollar business but not your own.
✔ You can celebrate someone else’s creative genius but downplay your own ideas.
✔ You can see other people achieving the impossible—but when it comes to you? You hesitate.
That hesitation? That’s the programming you have to unlearn.
That hesitation is generational conditioning. It’s social expectations. It’s the past versions of yourself whispering doubts in your ear.
And it’s lying to you.
A Black woman sits or stands with journal and pen in hand, looking thoughtful and focused. Around her are visual representations of dreams and possibilities—images of different futures, pathways, opportunities glowing in burnt orange and gold light. She's examining her dreams and getting clear on what she really wants.
The Dream Audit: What Are You Really Aiming For?
If you’re ready to break past your limits, it’s time for a Dream Audit.
A reality check. A gut check. A way to measure whether you’ve been dreaming expansively—or just strategically.
Ask yourself:
🔥 Am I dreaming from a place of desire—or from a place of caution?
→ If your dream doesn’t stretch you, challenge you, or scare you, it might not be big enough.
🔥 Did I shrink my dream to fit my circumstances?
→ Your current reality is NOT your permanent reality. Dream beyond what you see.
🔥 Would the younger version of me be impressed or disappointed by how I’m thinking now?
→ If the child in you could see what you’ve settled for, what would they say?
🔥 If there were no obstacles—no lack of money, no fear of failure—what would I be aiming for?
→ Answer this honestly. Then ask yourself why you’re not aiming for it now.
A Black woman stands with hand on heart or arms open in a gesture of self-acceptance and permission. Her expression shows peace, confidence, and self-love. Bright burnt orange and gold light radiates from her center, creating a warm, welcoming aura. Around her are visual metaphors of permission and self-worth. She looks grounded and at ease.
How to Give Yourself Permission to Want More
Dreaming big isn’t just about ambition. It’s about self-permission.
✔ Permission to want something beyond what you’ve seen.
✔ Permission to desire more than what’s been modeled for you.
✔ Permission to believe that you deserve to go further than anyone before you.
And if you need that permission today, I’m giving it to you.
But here’s what I need from you:
Stop making your goals “reasonable.”
🔥 Unreasonable people change the world.
🔥 Unreasonable dreams shake the culture.
🔥 Unreasonable vision is what gets the impossible done.
So be a little unreasonable.
Don’t shrink to make other people comfortable.
Don’t downplay your ideas because they feel too big.
Don’t edit yourself before you’ve even gotten started.
Because you don’t win by playing small.
A Black woman steps forward or reaches beyond a boundary, moving into the unknown with determination. Behind her is a dimmer, smaller space representing what feels safe. In front of her is bright, expansive possibility with burnt orange and gold light radiating outward. Her expression shows courage mixed with vulnerability—scared but moving forward anyway.
The Challenge: Go Bigger Than What Feels Safe
This week, I want you to do ONE thing:
Expand the vision.
✔ Take that goal you’ve been thinking about—and make it BIGGER.
✔ Take that dream you’ve been watering down—and give it back its full power.
✔ Take that thing you were going to do eventually—and decide to do it NOW.
Because your dream is waiting for you to claim it.
🔥 Are you going to step up—or are you going to keep playing it safe?
The choice is yours.
But I hope you choose the impossible.
🔥 Next Week: Week 4 – The Future You’re Avoiding (And Why You Need to Face It Now)
→ Why we fear our own success—and how to stop running from it.
→ How to step into the future version of yourself without hesitation.
→ The steps to start living as HER now, not “one day.”
A Black woman looks inward or downward, hand on heart, acknowledging the fear beneath her dreams. Around her are visual representations of fears—shadowy but not overwhelming—beginning to transform into burnt orange and gold light as she names and faces them. Her expression shows vulnerability and courage. She's not running from the fear—she's facing it.
Name the Fear Behind the Dream
Most women don’t shrink their dreams because the dream is unrealistic.
They shrink them because of the fear attached to the dream.
This challenge helps them separate the dream itself from the fear that’s dimming it.
THE BONUS CHALLENGE: Identify the Fear Blocking Your Biggest Dream
HOW TO DO IT:
✔ Small: Write down your biggest dream in one sentence.
✔ Medium: Name the fear that makes you hesitate.
✔ Big: Replace the fear with a belief that pushes you forward.
EXAMPLE
Small: Write the dream in one uncensored sentence.
“I want to build a million-dollar business that changes my family’s entire financial future.”
Medium: Identify the fear behind it.
“I’m afraid I don’t have the support, the knowledge, or the consistency to pull it off. I’m afraid I’ll fail publicly and prove everyone right.”
Big: Replace it with a forward-moving belief.
“Every skill I need, I can learn.
Every gap I have, I can fill.
Every fear I feel is a sign I’m walking toward a bigger version of myself.
I don’t need certainty — I need willingness.”
Dr. Sagashus inviting you into the IMverse through the Wanted Newsletter or coaching.
FAQ SECTION
Q1: What is a “Dream Audit”?
A Dream Audit is your chance to examine whether the goals you’ve been setting come from desire or from fear. It helps you uncover whether you’ve been dreaming expansively — or dreaming safely to avoid disappointment.
Q2: How do I know if my dream is too small?
Your dream is too small if:
it feels comfortable
it fits neatly into your current circumstances
it doesn’t require you to grow
you can say it out loud without feeling exposed
If it doesn’t stretch you — or scare you — it’s probably not your real dream.
Q3: Why do I struggle to dream bigger?
Most women don’t struggle with imagination — they struggle with permission.
We’ve inherited messages like:
“Be realistic.”
“Don’t get your hopes up.”
“Know your place.”
So we shrink our dreams before the world has a chance to reject them. The Dream Audit helps you unlearn that.
Q4: How do I expand my dream by 20%?
It doesn’t mean double it — it means stretch it.
Ask yourself:
“What is the part of the dream I’ve been too afraid to admit?”
20% is the bold edge:
the scale you trimmed down
the impact you softened
the number you lowered
the desire you muted
Expand it just enough that it feels thrilling again.
Q5: What if dreaming big scares me?
Good.
Fear doesn’t mean the dream is wrong — it means the dream is real. Your nervous system reacts when you approach a version of yourself you’ve never seen before. That’s growth, not danger.
Q6: How do I take action on a dream that feels too big?
Start small.
This week’s challenge:
Write the uncensored dream.
Expand it by 20%.
Take ONE tiny action toward it.
Consistency beats intensity.
Q7: How does this fit into the Infamous Mothers lifestyle?
Infamous Mothers aren’t just surviving.
We are:
🔥 building
🔥 expanding
🔥 creating what our mothers and grandmothers never saw
Dreaming bigger is part of reclaiming legacy, identity, and possibility — without apology.
ABOUT THE BLOGGER
Dr. Sagashus Levingston is an author, entrepreneur and PhD holder. She has two fur babies, Maya and Gracie, six children (three boys and three girls), and they all (including her partner) live in Madison, WI. She loves all things business, is committed to reminding moms of their power, and is dedicated to playing her part in closing the wealth gap for people of color and women. She believes that mothering is a practice, like yoga, and she fights daily to manage her chocolate intake. The struggle is real, y’all…and sometimes it’s beautiful.
Follow her on Instagram: @infamous.mothers