Bad Girl Fit
The Bad Girl Fit series was designed to expand the face and lifestyle circumstances of those who deserve to be physically healthy and strong to include women who are not always seen as “proper or acceptable,” both morally and socially, in health and wellness places.
Pledge 1: I pledge to not be a martyr. I work “to life,” not death.
“A man is not fit to live unless he has something to die for.” I read these words from Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. in my youth. For a long time, having something to die for became the measure of my life. That changed when I became a mother. As a single mom of six, dying is far easier than living. Motherhood, as we’ve been taught, requires us to kill bits of ourselves every day so that our children can live. It expects us to kill our dreams, murder our desires, and assassinate anything that makes us look “not respectable.” In the name of loving our children and avoiding the wrath that comes from the public gaze, we commit small suicides every day out of fear of being bludgeoned to death by the “mommy police.”
Perhaps one of the biggest deaths we experience is the loss of our own self-care and overall health and wellness. I’m no exception. There have been many periods in my life when I’ve sacrificed my regular treadmill routines, daily walks, and strength training to build my company to provide for my family. I am guilty of binge eating brownies and cakes because it’s quicker to do that than fix a meal when I am working on launching this project or preparing for that talk. One child needs shoes, another needs money for her wedding, and someone else needs help with a down payment on a car, all while I make sure the mortgage gets paid. And yet, if I am the perpetual sacrifice, eventually, there will be no more of me left. Who will take care of my family then? Who will take care of me? No one. I can’t die for them. For their sake, I have to live. I have to live to show my children what it means to accomplish impossible dreams, experience pleasure, and bounce back from setbacks. I have to live to show them that being a mother doesn’t mean relinquishing my humanity and, in my case, my womanhood. Birthing lives doesn’t mean sacrificing our own.
Today’s Challenge: Breathe
Today, I invite you to consider this: Is there a part of you that you are currently sacrificing? What will it take for you to allow that piece of you to not only live but thrive? I challenge you to set an intention around that part of yourself and to dedicate five minutes of deep, quiet, meditative breaths to that intention.